


What Sober Couldn't Say

by tiffanyb98



Category: Guns N' Roses, Mötley Crüe
Genre: 1980s, Drug Addiction, Drug Use, Eating Disorders, F/M, Original Character(s), Physical Abuse, Rape/Non-con Elements, Underage Drinking, Underage Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-15
Updated: 2018-07-19
Packaged: 2018-12-02 13:25:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11510340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tiffanyb98/pseuds/tiffanyb98
Summary: Roxanne Daily moves to a new place for a chance at becoming an actress. Her life changed the night she met Tommy Lee.





	1. Take Me To The Top

Roxanne was from Miami, Florida originally and she had big dreams of modeling and acting in films, but she knew she would never make it Miami. She needed to get to LA to make it big. She took the greyhound bus from Miami all the way to Los Angeles so she could stand a chance at making it in the modeling and/or acting industry. 

Upon arriving in LA, she found the cheapest motel she could and got a room for the night. It was grubby and definitely had a rat problem. The walls were so thin she heard that she heard a couple arguing a couple rooms over. The room would have to do for now, she couldn't blow all her money on a glitzy room on the first night. She had $300 that she had been saving since she was nine years old. 

Roxanne went out to do some exploring, since she was new to the city. She found herself drawn to one spot in particular, The Whisky A Go-Go. She got in with ease, thanks to her fake ID that a friend had made for her before she left Miami. She went to the bar, sitting down on a stool. 

She ordered a drink and sipped on it while she watched the people in the bar. The women who were crying into their empty glass over some man that didn't care about them, the men who were getting a drink after work. The men only there to find a one-night-stand, the dancers who were trying to make ends meet for their kids. And then in walked four guys, three with dark hair and a blonde. As soon as they walked in-laughing and yelling-women were crawling all over them and every other man seemed to give up trying to find their one-night-stand and settled for sitting at the bar to drink.

The blonde guy was the first to separate from the group, having been shoved into a chair and an eager redheaded dancer giving him a lap dance. 

The other three men mingled with the women that surrounded them.

An older man approached Roxanne. "Hey baby, can I buy you a drink?" He asked. 

"I've got one." Roxanne replied, hoping that he would get the hint that she didn't want to talk to him.

She was immediately creeped out by him. He looked like the kind of man that would spike her drink if she took her eyes off it for a split second too long. 

"You got a boyfriend?" He spoke again.

"I'm not interested in you." She said blatantly. 

He slid his hand up her bare thigh. 

"I said I'm not fucking interested." She said, slapping his hand away. 

He grabbed her by her throat. "You listen here, you little slut-" 

Another man shoved him away. "Hey get your hands off my girl." He said. Roxanne's savior looked at her and mouthed: go with it. He put an arm around her shoulders. "Are you okay, babe?" He asked. 

"Better now." She said honestly. 

"Sorry man, I didn't know she was yours." The first man put his hands up in defense and walked away to find his next victim. 

Roxanne looked at the guy who helped her. She recognized him as part of the rowdy four that brought life to the joint with just walking in. "Thank you so much. He was so creepy." She said, looking up at him.

"That's Steve, he's a local. You must be new here. I'm Tommy." He introduced himself with a smile. "What's your name?"

"I'm Roxanne." She told him with a smile. "I am new, just got in today." She added.

"In that case, welcome to LA. You can come hang out with me and the boys." 

He led her over to the remaining two guys with dark hair. "That's Mick." He pointed to the older of the two. "And that's Nikki." He pointed out the one with long dark teased hair. "That blonde guy over there getting a lap dance is Vince. Guys, this is Roxanne, she's new to LA."

"You got a place to stay?" Tommy asked Roxanne. 

"Some shitty motel room." She said and shrugged. 

"You can stay with us, if you want." Nikki offered. 

"If it is okay with you guys that would be great." Roxanne said. 

"You're more than welcome, Rox." Tommy told her. 

"Okay." She agreed. 

From that moment on, Roxanne and Tommy were virtually inseparable. If a creepy guy tried to pick up Roxanne, Tommy would step in. If some overly-slutty girl tried to hit on Tommy, Roxanne was there. It was beneficial for both of them. 

Her newfound roommates were in a band called Mötley Crüe and they were going to put out their first album later on in the year. Mick had his own place, but the others had an apartment together. 1124 N. Clark St apartment number 205 was just steps from the Whisky and was known as the Mötley house. Despite being infested with roaches and having mysterious stains on the carpet, its occupants loved it. It only had two bedrooms and one bed in each, so Roxanne usually found herself in Tommy's bed. If Nikki managed to make it to bed, it would be himself and Vince in the other bed. And if someone had someone over, their bedmate would crash on the couch.

Roxanne woke up to the sun shining in her eyes and she groaned, flipping over onto her stomach. 

Tommy felt around blindly until he found her shoulder and shook her. "Rox, flip the blinds." 

"I'm trying to sleep." She mumbled into her pillow.

"So am I. Flip the blinds or I'll tickle you." He threatened playfully. 

She jumped out of bed and flipped the blinds to where the light was no longer shining in. She flopped down beside Tommy, who smiled at her. 

"You're really beautiful, Roxanne. You're not like all the other girls, you're prettier, inside and out." He said.

"Are you still drunk?" She asked.

"I'm completely sober." He replied. "I just want you to know that you're beautiful."

"Thank you, Tommy."

He slung his arm over her waist and they both fell back to sleep.

Around two, Roxanne managed to drag herself out of bed and make some food. She made bacon, scrambled eggs and toast. 

Vince was the first in the kitchen when he smelled the bacon. He stole a bite of eggs out of the pan and popped in his mouth.

"Are Nikki and Tommy awake yet?" Roxanne asked him. 

Nikki appeared in the doorway. "I am, don't know about your boyfriend though." 

Roxanne rolled her eyes. "He's not my boyfriend." She mumbled.

Tommy walked in, as if on cue. "Ooh eggs AND bacon?" He asked. 

"And toast too." Roxanne added. 

"We sure are lucky to have you." He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind. 

Roxanne divided the small amount of food up between the four of them and Vince's was gone in 2.5 seconds. 

"Are you going to eat that?" He pointed to a piece of bacon on Roxanne's plate. 

"You can have the rest." She pushed her plate towards him. 

He started eating what was left on her plate, which was about half of her food.

"I'm going to go take a shower." She stood, going into the bathroom. She lifted her shirt off her stomach, looking at in the mirror. Maybe she couldn't get hired because she was too heavy? 

She turned on the shower so no one could hear and shoved her fingers to the back of her throat, gagging herself and making her food come back up. Tears streamed down her cheeks as her throat burned. She hated puking but she felt she needed if she wanted to ever make it as an actress or model.

She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand when she was finished and then stripped off her clothes, getting into the shower.

A bit later, Roxanne was dressed and ready for the day. "I'm going out." She announced to her roommates as she strapped on her heels. 

Tommy looked at her. "Where are you going?" He asked. 

"To an audition." She told him. 

"Good luck, Rox." He told her.

"Good luck, Roxanne." Nikki and Vince said.

"Thank you." She said and left the house. She took a taxi to an agency and went inside, signing in. 

The other girls that were there to audition for the same part were all incredibly beautiful and made Roxanne feel insecure just with their looks. Not to mention they were bragging about all their previous jobs. Roxanne had worked at an ice cream parlor part time last summer, but that was all the work experience she had.

Girl after girl was called back to audition before they got to Roxanne. 

"Roxanne Daily?" A woman asked. 

Roxanne stood and followed her back to a room. In it was the casting director, a man probably in his mid to late thirties who was making her feel vulnerable underneath his stare. He had been married three times and had a kid with each woman. 

She read lines with the director and he stopped mid scene. 

"Roxanne, you're a great girl." He started. 

Roxanne's heart sank to her stomach. Fuck, she wasn't going to get this, was she? 

"Come here, sweetheart." He said. 

She walked over to him. 

"I'll give you the part if you do something for me." He told her in a low voice, drinking in her figure. 

Roxanne ended up giving him a blow job. She walked out of the room, disappointed in herself. She never wanted to sink that low. At least she got the part, right?

She went back to the Mötley house and let herself in with her key. Tommy, Vince and Nikki were all sat in the living room watching TV.

"How did it go?" Vince asked.

"I got the part." She said, looking down at her feet. 

"Why don't you seem happy about that?" Tommy asked. 

"I don't want to talk about it." She said softly. "I'm going to go to bed." She went to her and Tommy's room. 

Tommy followed and lie down beside her.

"Tommy." She sighed. 

"I'm not going to make you talk about it, I'm here to cuddle you because you're sad." He said, pulling her close to him. 

"Tommy, I did a bad thing." She told him after a few minutes. 

"I'm sure whatever it is, is not nearly as bad as you think." He said. 

"The director said he would give me the role if I did something for him and I was so sick of not getting any roles, so I did." 

"Roxanne, that's not that bad." Tommy said.

"Why do I feel like such a slut?" She asked. 

"You aren't a slut, not even close." He said. 

A tear slipped down her cheek and she turned away from him. 

"Roxanne, look at me." He said. 

She looked at him sadly. 

"You did what you had to do. You came out here to be an actress and you got your first role. You definitely aren't a slut, trust me." He said. 

"Okay." She said softly.


	2. Too Fast For Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roxanne tries cocaine and Axl enters the picture.

A few weeks passed and Roxanne acted in her first movie. She only had a small part but it was a start. She landed her second role a couple months later based solely on her acting skills, no favors needed. 

Nikki handed Roxanne a bottle of Jack. She looked at him. "What's this for?" 

"It's a congrats for your new role." He said with a smile. 

"Thanks, Nikki." She smiled.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Let’s crack that sucker open!" Vince got a few glasses.

Roxanne opened the bottle and poured everyone some Jack. 

Once everyone was buzzed, Vince brought out the blow and used a razor blade to make lines. 

"You go first, Rox." Tommy said.

Roxanne had never done drugs before, but she copied what she had seen everyone else do and started snorting the white powder. 

She did a line, feeling a slight burning sensation in her nose. 

"How do you feel?" Tommy asked Roxanne. 

"Like I could do another line." She grinned. 

"Atta girl! Go for it!" Vince encouraged. 

"Try rubbing it on your gums." Nikki instructed. 

Roxanne got some on her finger and rubbed it on her gums. She felt nothing different at first and then her gums were numb as well as the tip of her tongue.

In about ten minutes she felt an intense euphoria and it made her always want to feel that way. 

Cocaine became a regular thing for Roxanne after her second acting gig was finished. She would crave it all day and then go on a cocaine binge that night.

Mötley played a show and when they arrived home afterwards, they brought the after party with them. Roxanne was noticeably absent. 

"Have you heard from Roxanne?" Tommy asked Vince, who was grinding with a blonde girl.

"Haven't heard from her." He told the drummer. 

Tommy went around the party asking people if they had seen her. 

"I haven't seen the Roxanne you're describing, but this note was on the counter mate." A guy handed Tommy a note that read:

Meeting Seth, should be home by the time the show is over  
-Roxanne

Seth was their usual dealer. 

"Shit." Tommy muttered. "Thanks man." He pat the guy on the shoulder and walked away.

A few minutes later Roxanne got home and she seemed a bit dazed. She stood there while partygoers danced around her.

"Roxanne!" Tommy called to her. 

She looked around confused. 

Tommy pushed his way past people and over to her. "Rox, are you alright?" He asked. 

"'M fine, no need to worry about me." She said giving him a big smile.

He could tell immediately that she was all doped up. 

"C'mon let’s get you to bed, it's late." He said, starting to leading her to their room. 

She dug her heels into the ground. "But the party is still going on." She whined.

"Don't worry about that lets go." He said. 

"Tommy, I wanna party." She pouted. 

"Yeah Tommy, let her party." A deep voice said behind Tommy. 

They both turned to look at the guy. He was probably a couple years older than Roxanne with long ginger hair. He had an androgynous look to him, but then again so did most of the people Roxanne hung out with. She couldn't deny that he was attractive. 

"I'm Axl." The guy introduced himself to Roxanne. 

"Hi there." She waved. "I'm Roxanne." She told him. "This is my roommate and friend, Tommy." She added as an afterthought. 

"You wanna dance, sweetie?" Axl asked with a charming smile. 

"Okay." She agreed with a slight smile. 

Axl took her hand and lead her over to where everyone else was dancing. He put his hands on her hips and she put her hands on his shoulders. With her in heels, she was an inch or two taller than him but they still looked good together.

They danced for a song.

Within a few days Roxanne and Axl were dating and Tommy had never been more jealous of anyone in his entire life. Especially since it seemed like Axl made a point to kiss Roxanne every single chance he had, no matter who was around. Roxanne was supposed to be his girl, not Axl Rose's. 

Neither of them seemed to care about their four year age gap or the fact that she was still a minor. Their relationship bothered Tommy the most, but Nikki got annoyed when Axl started hanging around the Mötley house constantly. 

"One of these days you're going to get caught, Roxanne." Mick said. "Your relationship is illegal until you turn eighteen."

"I never played by the rules anyway." Roxanne said with a shrug. "Plus, Elvis and Priscilla started dating when she was like, fifteen."

"Roxanne, that was like twenty years ago." Vince reminded her. 

"Now it’s the eighties and everyone's too fucked up to care." Roxanne pointed out.

Everyone was silent for a moment, she was right. 

"Rox, you want to go to Duke's with me?" Axl broke the silence. 

"Yeah, let’s go." She agreed. "I'll see you guys later." She said to her roommates. 

"See ya, Roxanne. Bye Axl." Nikki waved.

"Bye guys." Vince and Mick said. 

"Bye." Tommy said shortly. He always wanted Axl to leave, but he wished Roxanne wouldn't go with him. 

"See you later boys." Axl said and put his arm around Roxanne's waist, leading her out. 

They got on his motorcycle and he began driving him to the local favorite coffee shop, Duke's. He parked his bike and they went inside. 

They had a coffee together and then went to the motel Axl was staying at, the Tropicana Motel on Santa Monica Blvd.

Roxanne got a plastic bag out of her jacket pocket and put some of its contents on the dresser. She got her switchblade out of her pocket and took the blade out of it, using it to make lines. She snorted a line and looked at Axl. "You want a line?" She asked. 

"Yeah." He dipped his head down and snorted a line. He indulged in cocaine and alcohol every once and awhile, but was nowhere near dependent on drugs as Roxanne was. He could have a couple beers and still be chill, but Roxanne always needed more. That was where her addictive personality came into play.

Roxanne did another two lines. 

"Okay, I think that's enough for now, doll." Axl put a hand on her shoulder, pulling her back gently. 

"Mmhm." She hummed in agreement. 

Axl leaned over and kissed her. She kissed him back.


	3. Dark Nights

Roxanne spent the night with Axl and woke up the next morning in his arms. She got out of his arms quietly, managing to not wake him. She got out an eight ball of coke and made a couple of lines on the dresser, snorting them. 

Axl woke up once she was finished.

"Mm, time is it?" He mumbled, lighting up his first cancer stick of the day.

Roxanne looked at the clock. "Nine thirty." She told him.

She slipped out of bed and picked up her shirt. "Axl, you literally ripped my shirt in half." She whined. 

"I'll wear yours, you take mine." He tossed his shirt to her. 

She pulled it on and handed him the ripped shirt. She put on her jeans and shoes. 

Axl got dressed as well. "Y'wanna go grab breakfast?" He asked. 

"Okay." She agreed. 

She was still barely eating enough to survive and throwing up 90% of what she did get down. She only agreed to go to spend more time with Axl. 

"Great." Axl smiled. 

They left the Tropicana Motel and went to Denny's. They had biscuits and gravy for a dollar and a quarter.

After they ate breakfast, Axl drove Roxanne home because she had a modeling gig to go to in an hour and a half and needed to clean up first. 

"You gonna stick around to go with me?" She asked as he turned off his bike. 

"Yeah because I like hanging out with you." He said with a smile, putting an arm around her shoulders. 

She smiled and kissed his cheek before unlocking the front door to the apartment. Mick was, of course, not there. He was probably still at home with his girl. Vince was sleeping on the couch so it was a safe bet to say that Nikki probably had someone over. Tommy was coming out of the kitchen with a cigarette hanging in between his lips.

"Hey Tommy." Roxanne greeted him. 

"Hey, have a good night?" He asked her. 

"A real good night." Roxanne answered and looked at Axl with a smile. "I'll be back in a bit." She added.

She got her clothes for the day and went in the bathroom. She took a shower and got ready for the day. She did her makeup and teased her hair. Once she was done, she left the bathroom. She put on a pair of shoes. 

Vince was up and moving now. "Look at you, Rox." He said with a whistle.

She simply laughed. "Can I borrow your car?" 

"Why do you always wanna borrow my car?" He laughed. 

"Well Nikki totaled his, Tommy doesn't have one either and Mick won't let anyone drive his car except him. So you're my only option here." 

He laughed again. "Glad to know I'm your first pick. You need your own car." He handed her his car keys. 

"Well if you wanna buy me one then by all means, we'll be friends for life. Until then, I'll keep borrowing yours." 

"You'll get your own car one day, I'm sure of it." 

"Here's to hoping. I'll bring the car back in like seven or eight hours." 

"Later darlin'. See ya, Axl." 

"See ya man." Axl said and followed Roxanne out the door. 

Roxanne went out to Vince's red Ferrari Testarossa with Axl following her. She got in the driver’s seat, cranking the car and Axl got in the passenger’s seat. She backed out of the driveway and began driving them towards Beverly Hills, where she would have a photo-shoot.

"When's your birthday, Rox?" Axl asked.

"April 17." She told him. 

"That's a long time till you turn eighteen." He said. 

Roxanne thought about it for a moment. It was mid-September now, so it was more than a few months until her next birthday.

"Does my age bother you?" She asked him.

"Not a bit, babe, I just don't want it to be technically illegal. I'd marry you tonight if you were legal." 

Roxanne laughed. "You're so crazy, Axl." She said. 

"Would you marry me, if we could?" He asked as she slowed to a stop at a red light.

She looked over at him. "Yes I would." She didn't hesitate for even a moment.

He smiled at her and pecked her lips. "I love you, Roxanne." 

"I love you, Axl." She said.

"One day I will marry you." He said confidently.

The light turned green and Roxanne continued driving. 

They got to the shoot soon and it lasted a full eight hours. Once the shoot was over, Roxanne drove herself and Axl back to the Mötley house. 

Once they got out of the car, Axl swept Roxanne off her feet making her laugh. He carried her to the apartment and she unlocked it. He toted her inside and she tossed Vince his car keys. 

"Back in one piece. Good job, Rox." Vince said, putting the keys on the side table. "How was your shoot?" 

"It went well. I'm glad to be home though so I can take off my makeup." She laughed.

Roxanne took off her makeup and she and Axl went off to the bedroom because Roxanne wanted a nap. 

Roxanne lie in Axl's arms and Axl was tracing imaginary lines on her arm. 

"Roxanne, I'd never hurt you. You know that right?" He spoke out of nowhere.

She looked up at his face. "Where did that come from?" She asked.

"I just got to thinking about how much you mean to me and I want you to know that I'd never hurt you." He told her, looking into her big blue eyes. "I love you, Roxanne." 

"I love you, Axl." She said, leaning up to give him a peck on the lips before laying her head back down. 

She fell asleep in his arms. 

A couple months later, November rolled around. Tonight was one of Slash's girlfriend's birthday. Everyone was at a club celebrating. 

Roxanne was doing line after line of coke in the bathroom. The girls she was doing coke with forced her to take a break and sent her over to Axl. He put an arm around her waist. "Are you alright?" He asked in her ear, so she could hear him over the music. 

"Yeah I'm good." She nodded. 

The party carried on into the early hours of the morning and over to the Tropicana Motel. Roxanne, Axl, Tommy, Duff, Slash and his girlfriend-whose name had slipped Roxanne's mind-were in Axl's motel room, still partying. Slash's girlfriend brought out a baggy of coke and formed several lines. 

"Can I do a couple lines?" Roxanne asked eagerly.

"Sure babe." She nodded. 

Roxanne snorted two more lines. 

A few minutes later, all the coke she had snorted kicked in all at once. Roxanne's head was pounding, it felt like someone was striking her brain repeatedly with a sledgehammer. She was really dizzy and nauseated so she had to sit with her head in between her knees. 

"Are you okay, Rox?" Axl asked her, kneeling down beside her. 

"My chest hurts so fucking bad." She told him. 

"That's not normal for coke to do that." Tommy said, walking over to them.

"I think she overdosed. Someone call 911!" Slash's girlfriend said with a sense of urgency.

"NO! Don't call 911! They're going to book Axl." Roxanne protested.

"They aren't going to book me, sweetheart, you need medical attention." Axl said. 

"I'm fine. In fact, I've never been better! No need to call 911." She said, wincing at the pain in her chest. 

"I'm calling 911." Duff said, nearly tripping over his feet to grab the phone and dialing 911.

"Oh my God." Roxanne curled up in a ball, starting to cry. "They're going to arrest you, they're going to charge you for being with me. It's all my fault." She sobbed. 

"Roxanne, it's okay. They don't have to know." Axl said, smoothing her hair out. His fingers brushed her forehead. "You're burning up. Can someone get her something cold? Please!" 

There was some moving around and Tommy put a cold cloth to Roxanne's forehead. At some point everything started to feel like a dream. "Roxanne, baby, stay with me." Axl said. 

His voice sounded far away, but she saw him right beside her. 

"I'm sorry." She whispered. 

"Roxanne, stay awake!" Tommy encouraged.

"An ambulance is on the way!" Duff said in the background.

Some time later, Roxanne was in a drug-induced coma in the hospital. Axl was so relieved to know that she was alive, even if she was in a coma. She was still in there somewhere. 

Tommy, Vince, Mick and Nikki were shocked at what happened to Roxanne. The good little girl from Miami who had fallen hard to a nasty habit. And it was them who had introduced her to it. To be fair, none of them knew any better. 

They were all equally addicted to some substance or other. None of them knew that she would fall into the vicious cycle of coke and alcohol so quickly and easily.


	4. A Lesson Never Learned

Roxanne had been in a coma for two days now. All of her friends had come to see her. 

Axl hadn't been arrested for his relationship with Roxanne, mostly because the police weren't aware of it. They assumed everyone was a friend of Roxanne's and Axl damn sure wasn't going to tell them that he was dating and sleeping with Roxanne. That would sure get him arrested again. Slash's girlfriend had been arrested for cocaine possession with intent to distribute.

Axl was at the hospital by Roxanne's side at every moment possible. Tommy did his best to do the same.

It was a rainy afternoon, which was rare for LA. Tommy and Axl sat in Roxanne's hospital room, watching a re-run of "Married... With Children" on the small TV across from Roxanne's hospital bed.

They had been sitting there for a few hours, just waiting for Roxanne to wake up. While Tommy was grateful for the steady beep of the machines, meaning Roxanne was alive, they annoyed the shit out of him.

"When do you think she'll wake up?" Tommy asked Axl.

"Hopefully soon. The doctor I talked to said he wasn't sure exactly when it'll happen." Axl responded, lighting up a cigarette.

Roxanne woke up, but she heard Axl and Tommy talking so she stayed quiet.

"Do her dad and brother know?" Tommy questioned.

"Yeah, one of the staff called them. Her dad is disappointed and her brother is livid. Her mom died of a meth overdose when she was four, y'know." Axl told him, taking a drag off his cigarette.

"Yeah, that's a shame," Tommy said quietly.

Axl nodded in agreement.

They were silent for a few moments and Roxanne took this as a chance to let them know she had woken up. She looked around. "Axl?" She whispered. Her voice was rough from disuse.

"Roxanne!" Axl jumped to his feet and went to her side. He held her hand. "You scared the hell out of everyone!" He exclaimed.

"What happened to me?" She asked.

"You overdosed, Rox." Tommy spoke up from her other side.

She looked over at him sadly.

"You've been in a drug-induced coma for two days." He explained.

Axl smoothed her hair back.

"Is my dad really disappointed in me?" She asked.

"That's his words, not mine," Axl said.

A balding man most likely in his late fifties, who appeared to be a doctor, walked in holding a clipboard. "Miss. Daily, glad to see you're awake. I'm Dr. Sanders, I've been taking care of you. Do you know what happened?" He asked.

"I overdosed," Roxanne said quietly.

"You overdosed and were on the brink of death. You were in a coma for two days." Dr. Sanders informed her.

"Wow." Roxanne ran a hand through her hair.

"If your friend hadn't of called when he did, you would've been gone in a matter of minutes." The doctor continued. "All that cocaine is terrible for your heart. You're fifty percent more likely to have a heart attack or a stroke, especially if you don't quit. Here's the number for a local rehabilitation center, I'd suggest checking in as soon as possible." He handed her a business card.

"I don't need this. I'm in control of myself and my actions." She ripped the business card in half and let it fall to the bed sheet. "Now, when am I getting out of here?" She asked sweetly.

"Miss Daily, I urge you to reconsider your decision. I don't think you understand the severity of your situation. You need to kick your addiction before-"

A tall, muscular brunette in his early twenties walked in. He held a striking resemblance to Roxanne. They the same blue eyes and the same button nose. It was safe to say he was probably Roxanne's brother.

"Josh." She breathed, surprised.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Roxanne? Are you trying to end up like mom!?" He exclaimed.

"I'm not that bad, Josh." Roxanne muttered.

"Not that bad?" He scoffed. "Mom started off just like you. Her addiction began with acid and then it wasn't enough so she tried cocaine, and then before you know it meth! Are you trying to die!?"

"Sir, please calm down." Dr. Sanders urged.

"Well?" Josh demanded from Roxanne.

"No, I'm not." Roxanne insisted, starting to get frustrated all over again. He could never understand because he had never been there.

"Are you already doing meth? Or are you just addicted to coke?" Josh asked.

"I'm not on meth and I'm not addicted to cocaine! In fact, I can quit whenever the hell I want!" Roxanne spat.

"Then fucking do it before it's too late! This is not what you came to LA for! I told you that you should've stayed in Miami and this shit wouldn't have happened!" He yelled at his baby sister.

A nurse stepped into the doorway. "Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to leave. Other patients are complaining." She directed at Josh.

Josh looked at Roxanne. "This conversation isn't over. I'm moving out here to watch you." He left the room before she could protest.

Roxanne groaned and looked at Dr. Sanders. "When can I leave?" She asked.

"You can leave after you sign these release forms." He handed her the clipboard.

She scribbled her signature in the necessary spots and gave it back.

He gave her one last wary look before leaving the room.

"I don't like that guy." Roxanne removed her IV.

"Rox, you should be more careful," Tommy said gently. "You're only seventeen and you already almost died."

"Tommy, I'm fine." Roxanne insisted. "I'm alive now, aren't I?" She nudged him with a slight smile.

"Yeah, you are."

Roxanne got changed into street clothes and they left the hospital, going back to the Motley house.

"Hey, glad to see you're okay, Roxanne," Nikki said as everyone took turns hugging her.

"You better not die on us, Rox. We'd miss you too much." Vince said.

"I'd miss you guys too," Roxanne said. "But I'm fine. Now is the time to celebrate! Sixx, you got any coke?" 

"I'm all out. I've got smack though." Nikki told her.

"That'll do, I just wanna get high."

"Roxanne, are you sure?" Axl asked worriedly. Heroin was one helluva drug.

"It's one time, Axl, a celebratory high. I'll be fine." Roxanne told him.

"I'll hook you up, Rox." Nikki said and got a trash can, explaining that most people threw up the first time they used heroin. Axl was giving Roxanne a sad look.

"It's one time." She reminded him, rubbing his arm.

Nikki put a tourniquet on her arm, found a vein and got a fresh needle out. He drew up the heroin and gave Roxanne a full hit. Once it was fully injected, he took the tourniquet off.

"Now just relax." He told her.

Roxanne felt different waves of warmth around her body and she did indeed puke, just a bit. Then she sat back and let the rush hit her. Oh god, was it good.

"She's feeling really good right about now," Nikki smirked and shot up as well.

"It's like I'm wrapped in a nice warm blanket." Roxanne smiled.

The original high lasted for about twenty minutes and for the next six hours, Roxanne felt relaxed and carefree.

Roxanne did heroin once more that week before deciding that she couldn't do it anymore without becoming dependent on it. She did, however, keep snorting cocaine, a few lines a day. When she didn't have cocaine for a few hours, if her dealer couldn't get it to her for some reason, she was just pissed off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh man, sorry this took so long to post. I have it all written out on my laptop, but it no longer connects to the internet?? So I'm using my boyfriend's laptop. I'll try to get better at updating more often, but I make no promises haha. 
> 
> Also, sorry it ended in a weird spot. It's one big document on my laptop rather than chapters, so I'm still trying to navigate where each chapter should end.


	5. Hooligan's Holiday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the holiday season and things are as wild as ever. 
> 
> PS: I know the chapter title is a Motley-Corabi song, but I couldn't think of a better title haha

Motley released their first album 'Too Fast For Love' two days after Roxanne got out of the hospital and soon after that, they went on tour. Roxanne stuck around in LA to watch the house. She did several modeling gigs and had a small role in a TV show. Josh kept to his word and was now living in LA, keeping a close watch on his baby sister.

Soon it was Thanksgiving and the whole gang decided to go to Seventh Veil. They hadn't known prior to arriving, but it was girls night. The guys wanted to leave immediately.

"I'm not leaving, so neither are you," Roxanne said, taking Axl's hand and starting to lead him further inside the strip club.

Motley started to walk off but Roxanne grabbed Nikki and Vince by the back of their shirts, effectively holding them back. Tommy and Mick stopped in their tracks as well. "Not so fast boys, you're all staying," Roxanne said.

The five of them groaned.

"Think of it this way: it's girls night so there will be plenty of women for you guys to pick from." Roxanne offered, looking at Motley.

"You make a damn good point," Nikki said.

"We'll stay," Vince added.

They all agreed to stay and several beers later, Vince decided it would be a good idea to join the dancers on stage and start dancing as well.

Later they were back at the Motley house. Mick had gone to his place hours ago. Vince had brought home two strippers for himself.

Everyone was sharing what they were thankful for.

"I'm thankful for smack and dope," Nikki said.

"I'm thankful for strippers." Vince motioned to his two strippers. One of them was kissing his neck and the other was rubbing his shoulders.

"I'm thankful for my drum kit." Tommy was next.

"I'm thankful for Roxanne," Axl said and Roxanne kissed his cheek.

"What are you thankful for, Roxanne?" Nikki asked.

"Axl, of course and cocaine." She smiled.

And so Thanksgiving ended with Axl and Roxanne rolling around in bed.

December flew by and soon it was Christmas Day. Josh barged into the Motley house at seven AM signing Christmas carols. He narrowly dodged a bottle of Jack being thrown at his head by Nikki.

"I'm trying to sleep!" Nikki covered his head with his pillow.

"It's time to get up! It's Christmas!" Josh said enthusiastically.

Roxanne entered the room with Axl and Tommy trailing behind her. Vince emerged from his and Nikki's room and escorted his one night stand to the door as she blabbed on and on.

"You should meet my pa-" The brunette started and Vince shut the door in her face, effectively cutting her off.

"That bitch never shuts up!" Vince exclaimed, putting emphasis on never. "She even talks in her sleep!" He added.

"It's time for presents!" Josh declared.

"Wait, what about Mick?" Roxanne asked sitting on the arm of the couch.

Mick walked in as if on cue. "Merry Christmas." He said.

"NOW it's time for presents. I'll go first." Vince gave everyone a pen from the bank.

"Really, Vince?" Nikki questioned. "This is the best you could do? Pens that are free?"

"Well, I was going to give you guys mints too, but I ate those on the way home from the bank," Vince admitted with a sheepish smile.

"Wow, I don't know how anyone could top that," Tommy said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Josh cleared his throat. "My turn." He gave everyone a mug with their name on it, with the exception of Nikki. "I couldn't find your name, Nikki, so I got the next best thing." He presented Nikki with a mug that said "World's Biggest Bitch".

"Pretty accurate in my humble opinion," Josh added with a shrug.

Mick got everyone a random postcard and scribbled on the back: "Merry Christmas, fuckers '81" Nikki and Tommy teamed up and got everyone a beer.

"What about you and Axl, Rox?" Nikki asked.

Roxanne stood up. "Well, we didn't know what to get you guys."

"Sexual favors would be accepted from you, Rox." Vince winked at her.

Axl and Josh scowled at him, Roxanne just laughed.

"Well, we had an even better plan. Strippers for all of you!" She opened the front door and a stream of strippers flooded through.

One for each member of Motley and one for Josh.

"Best Christmas ever!" Vince yelled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was one of my favorite chapters to write haha. I hope you guys like it!


	6. Pick Me Up

On April 17, 1982, it was Roxanne's eighteenth birthday. Roxanne and Axl went to a wedding chapel with Slash and Duff, who would be their witnesses. An old man was the officiant.

Everything was kept short and sweet. No music, their families weren't there. Roxanne didn't have a proper wedding dress, just a negligee that Axl had bought her for cheap.

It was the two of them, the rings, Duff and Slash.

"By the power vested in me by the state of California, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss the bride." The officiant said.

Axl kissed Roxanne and she kissed him back for a few moments before they pulled apart.

Duff stood up and clapped enthusiastically and Slash sat him back down.

"Wait a minute." Slash hissed at the blonde.

"It is my honor to present to you for the first time as man and wife, Mr. and Mrs. Axl Rose." The officiant announced.

"Now?" Duff looked at Slash.

"Now." He confirmed. 

They both stood and clapped.

Roxanne and Axl walked up the aisle holding hands.

"Happy birthday, Roxanne." Axl kissed her cheek.

"Thank you." She smiled and cuddled into his side.

"Is there going to be a honeymoon?" Slash nudged Axl with a wink.

"At the Motley house. We aren't going anywhere." Axl responded.

A couple of hours later, Roxanne and Axl were at the Motley house. The band was on tour so the two of them had it all to themselves. The phone rang around seven that night.

Roxanne got out of bed, holding the bed-sheet to cover her otherwise bare body. "Hello?" She answered in a sing-song voice.

"Happy birthday, Roxanne!" Four voices she knew oh-so-well chorused.

"Thank you!" She said happily. "How is the tour going, boys?" She asked sitting on the edge of the bed.

Motley Crue told her their many adventures from the road and she listened, chipping in with "that sounds good" and "why did you eat that, Vince?" when appropriate. 

"It's not about us, though. How has your birthday been so far?" Tommy asked.

"It's been great!" She said, then giggled. "Axl and I got married today." She revealed, playing with the diamond ring that sat proudly on her finger.

They all congratulated her, but Tommy's congrats was a bit forced. He made his excuses to end the phone call and Roxanne told them goodbye before they hung up.

On the other side of the country, in a motel room in North Carolina, Tommy Lee was pissed off.

"What's up, T-Bone?" Vince asked as the three of them watched the drummer pace the floor.

"I can't believe she married that idiot! I never had a fucking chance with her! He snatched her out of my hands and married her as soon as she was eighteen!"

"They probably won't last, Tommy." Nikki attempted to soothe his friend's rage. "I know you like her, but she's fucked up on drugs and doesn't know what she's getting into half the time." He added.

"I don't just like her, I'm in love with her for fuck's sake! She's meant to be mine!" Tommy tugged at his hair. "Fuck!" He yelled and punched a hole in the wall.

"Here, you need a drink and to get laid. I'll call that hooker I met last night." Nikki handed him a bottle of whiskey and got the phone, dialing a number.

A couple of weeks later, Roxanne and Axl got their own one bedroom apartment together. Roxanne talked to Motley less and less and they grew further apart. Vince, Nikki, and Tommy were evicted from the Motley house shortly after Roxanne left.

Motley put out another album in 1983, Shout At The Devil, and it was even more popular than the first. They went out on another tour following the release. Roxanne was gaining momentum in her career as well, having several more small acting roles followed by her biggest role yet as a supporting actress in a moderately successful film. Axl had a band called Hollywood Rose with his friends Izzy, Chris, Johnny, and Steve.

Once Hollywood Rose ended after two years in 1985, Axl formed Guns N' Roses with Izzy, Tracii, Ole, and Rob. Ole was fired after a couple shows and replaced with Duff and Tracii left after an argument with Axl. His replacement was Slash and Rob quit soon after. His replacement was Steven. Finally, the lineup was stable in June and the band went on a short, disorganized tour of the West Coast. Roxanne went along with them.

Roxanne and Axl's marriage was becoming strained. It had all started with fame going to Axl's head, thinking he was the greatest thing to ever walk planet Earth. Then when Roxanne accepted a role that had her naked on camera for two seconds or less as she got out of the shower, Axl was pissed. He didn't want anyone to see his wife's body but him, meanwhile he could make out with all the groupies he wanted right in front of her and she was somehow supposed to be okay with it.

Roxanne was still doing a few lines of cocaine every day, despite Josh trying to send her to rehab. She stayed there for two days before managing to get out and go get high again.

Tommy tried to get over Roxanne, he really did. He dated and fucked plenty of girls, but they could never match up to Roxanne. They were nothing like her. Roxanne was sweet and caring, but she didn't take shit from anyone. These girls were too willing to do anything he wanted instead of talking him out of bad things. Tommy always held a candle for Roxanne, she was the one girl he couldn't forget.

By 1987, Guns N' Roses had quickly risen to fame and Roxanne was there for Axl, despite their problems, while still managing to gain her own popularity. She had done modeling for some of the biggest companies around and acted in more than half a dozen movies.

Roxanne and Axl's relationship took a turn for the worst when Axl reached his breaking point after one too many drinks. Izzy had hit on Roxanne and then made the huge mistake of kissing her right in front of Axl.

"C'mon, let's go." Axl grabbed Roxanne's wrist roughly, leading her to their hotel room.

"Axl, you're hurting me!" She said, trying to pry his fingers off her wrist.

He only tightened his grip and towed her into their hotel room, slamming the door behind himself. He dropped her to the ground.

"Axl, please, it wasn't my fault! He kissed me, not the other way around!" She got to her feet and put her arms out in front of herself. She backed up slowly until her back hit the wall.

"I don't fucking care who did what! It happened!" He yelled in her face.

Tears streamed down her cheeks. She had never been so scared in her whole life, nor had she ever seen her husband this angry. He looked like he wanted to kill her and she knew that he could if he seriously wanted to.

"Axl, please don't do this." She begged.

"Axl, please don't do this." He mocked her then laughed, wrapping a hand around her throat. "I could snap your neck right now."

"Please, Axl." She whispered, sniffling.

He picked her up by her throat and threw her across the room. She landed, hitting her head on the A/C unit. She touched her throat and got to her knees slowly.

Axl marched over to her and grabbed her by her hair, yanking her to her feet. He slammed her head into a table.

Once he had finished beating her until she was unconscious, he raped her and then left the room.

Roxanne came to many hours later, her body aching. Her lip was busted and bleeding down her chin, her eye was throbbing and she knew for a fact her arm was broken. She had broken it once before when she was seven while playing football with Josh.

She grabbed her belongings, shoving them into her bag. She ran as far as she could and found a pay phone, putting in some spare change. She dialed up the one person that would always be there for her. Josh. She crossed her fingers, hoping he would answer and he did on the third ring.

"Hello?" He asked. He sounded sleepy and it occurred to Roxanne that she had probably woken him in the middle of the night.

"Josh, it's Roxanne. I need you to come get me, please."

"Where are you?" He asked. She heard him grabbing his car keys.

She looked at her surroundings and rambled off the address of the store she was standing in front of.

"Please hurry." She begged, her voice breaking.

"Roxanne, why are you crying? What's going on?" He asked.

"I'll tell you when you get here. Just hurry please." She plead and hung up.

Within ten minutes, Josh's car pulled up and Roxanne got in the passenger seat.

"Rox, what the hell happened to you?" He asked shocked.

"Take me to your apartment please."

He started driving. "Rox, what happened?" He asked again.

"I fell down a flight of stairs." She lied. She wasn't ready to reveal what had truly happened. She would deal with it when she got home.

Except Josh could see right through her. He knew it was something else and he suspected it had something to do with Axl. He was brought from his thoughts when Roxanne spoke up.

"You were supposed to go straight, not turn. Where are you taking me?"

"To the ER. You need to get checked out."

Roxanne sighed but didn't argue. She was treated for her injuries and her arm was indeed broken so they put a cast on it.

"What happened to you, dear?" The nurse asked as she cleaned the blood off Roxanne's face.

"I fell down a flight of stairs." She lied.

"Oh, you poor thing. You need to be more careful." The nurse said.

"Yeah, I do," Roxanne mumbled. She needed to be more careful about who she was with. She used to think Axl would be the last person in the world that would hurt her. God damn was she naive.

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts so far? More to come!


End file.
